. . . Now you see . . . they' re not fit for humans . . ." "Put them on me.

The only thing that bothers me is if I'm in a restaurant and I'm eating and someone says, 'Hey, mind if I smoke?' I always say, 'No. Mind if I fart?

There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won't stand for that.

Lots of women are getting involved. They're not satisfied just being passengers anymore.

The banjo is such a happy instrument--you can't play a sad song on the banjo - it always comes out so cheerful.

A celebrity is any well-known TV or movie star who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair.

The environment changed with Martha Stewart and Enron.