My father is schizophrenia, but he's good people.

I went to a Karaoke Bar last night that didn't play any 70s music, at first I was afriad, oh I was petrified

So what if I can't spell Armaggedon? ... it's not the end of the world.

Allyson Smith reminds me of a younger, prettier, funnier me. Now if you'll excuse me, the ladies from my bridge club have arrived.

Even though I'm proud by dad invented the rear-view mirror, we're not as close as we appear.

I quit my job at the helium gas factory. I didn't like being spoken to in that voice.

You know who really gives kids a bad name? Posh and Becks.