Yes - I am usually overweight. I have had to be interested in diet because of being diabetic for 30 years and having kidney failure.

My skin is dead good. I think it must be a combination of being in love and Lucozade.

I'm spectacularly disorganised. I wrote my latest book in seven different notebooks scattered throughout my house.

There's only one thing more boring than listening to other people's dreams, and that's listening to their problems.

Adrian Mole's father was so angry that so many pepole got divorced nowadays. HE had been unhappilly married for 30 years, why should everybody else get away?

It's no surprise to me that intellectuals commit suicide, go mad or die from drink. We feel things more than other people. We know the world is rotten and that chins are ruined by spots.

I have decided to be a poet. My father said there isn't a suitable career structure for poets and no pensions and other boring things, but I am quite decided.