There should be a new, more honest euphemism. Like, I'm leaving office because I plan to solicit more anonymous sex in bathrooms.

Your initiations are worthwhile.

You can tell how smart people are by what they laugh at.

If you are capable people are happy to play with you.

I prefer the retro chic of spending Christmas just like Joseph and Mary did - Traveling arduously back to the place of your birth to be counted, with no guarantee of a bed when you get there.

You’re in competition with everyone.

When choosing sexual partners, remember: Talent is not sexually transmittable.