Poetry is one of the few nasty childhood habits I've managed to grow out of

American-style iced tea is the perfect drink for a hot, sunny day. It's never really caught on in the UK, probably because the last time we had a hot, sunny day was back in 1957.

Genies rarely have nightmares, for the same reason that elephants don't usually worry about being trampled underfoot. With the possible exception of bottles, there's nothing in the cosmos large enough or malicious enough to frighten them, or stupid enough to try.

There’s nothing bad about reincarnation per se, it’s basically a very good system, cost-effective and ecologically friendly.

It was irritating to have one's physical shortcomings pointed out quite so plainly twice in one evening, once by a beautiful girl and once by a dying badger.

Lawyers are predators in grey worsted

At any given time, ninety-nine-point-nine-five per cent of the human race are a confounded nuisance