I just want to be funny, I just want to do comedy.

I can't watch American Idol... it's like karaoke without the booze.

I'm not a hateful person and don't condone any kind of violence against others.

I want to let my fans know I love them and I'm coming your way and I'm bringing truckloads of funny.

People bring camera phones into comedy shows and clubs and concerts, and sound bites never come out right.

Too many people focus on the thing, instead of the heavenly glory of it. I don't want to give away what to expect.

I have snakes, three sharks, moray eels, piranhas, five scorpions and a bird spider. All of them are predators. They are dangerous but it's cool to have strong and powerful pets.