If I had my life to live over again, I'd live over a saloon.
I certainly do not drink all the time. I have to sleep you know.
Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.
I've never hit a woman in my life. Not even my own mother.
This job will drive me to drink, and for that reason, I will be eternally grateful.
There are seven natural openings in the head and body. A lawyer is the only human being with eight. The extra one is a slot to store money in, should his bank be unable to hold all of it.