I was really gifted at being able to construct a joke, but it's like they weren't even memorable, my first jokes, because they were so about nothing.

I feel today's society is so judgmental.

There are just so many more laws and rules that apply with marriage that do not come with domestic partnership and also to me it's the commitment.

You know the economy is bad when illegals start complaining that Americans are taking their jobs.

I love Costas. He's knows too much, but he's a good guy.

If you have a passion for it, then stop wishing and just do it.

Don't bother me while I'm eating, or when I'm coming out of the crackhouse or something. Just let me get going.