I don't think I was funny until college. I lived with some Harvard MD/PhD students - they were so smart, and what I contributed to the house was, I was the funny one.

My mother always said don't marry for money, divorce for money.

My husband wanted one of those big-screen TVs for his birthday. So I just moved his chair closer to the one we have already.

I don't think I was funny until college. I lived with some Harvard MD/PhD students - they were so smart, and what I contributed to the house was, I was the funny one.

I go running when I have to. When the ice cream truck is doing sixty.

I get my sense of humor from my parents. That's why they don't have one anymore.

I just got my first bikini. It's a three-piece: a top, a botton, and a blindfold for you.