I go running when I have to. When the ice cream truck is doing sixty.

I go running when I have to. When the ice cream truck is doing sixty.

I went to the 30th reunion of my preschool. I didn't want to go, because I've put on like a hundred pounds.

My husband wanted one of those big-screen TVs for his birthday. So I just moved his chair closer to the one we have already.

I don't think I was funny until college. I lived with some Harvard MD/PhD students - they were so smart, and what I contributed to the house was, I was the funny one.

People always come up to me and say that my smoking is bothering them....well it's killing me!

My mother always said don't marry for money, divorce for money.