All Modern Men are descended from a Wormlike creature but it shows more on some people.

The moral of the story of the Pilgrims is that if you work hard all your life and behave yourself every minute and take no time out for fun you will break practically even, if you can borrow enough money to pay your taxes.

It is because of his brain that he [modern man] has risen above the animals. Guess which animals he has risen above.

I do not travel. I am not much of an extrovert, and I'm not much interested in extroverted objects. I do not care for the 'ideas' of novelists. Novels are wonderful, of course, but I prefer newspapers.

Alexander III of Macedon is known as Alexander the Great because he killed more people of more different kinds than any other man of his time.

A few Cobras in your home will soon clear it of Rats and Mice. Of course, you will still have the Cobras.

Cæsar might have married her [Cleopatra], but he had a wife at home. There's always something.