Humor springs from rage, hay fever, overdue rent and miscellaneous hell.

Orangutans teach us that looks are not everything-but warned near it.

The hippopotamus looks monogamous- he looks as if he would have to be.

A few Cobras in your home will soon clear it of Rats and Mice. Of course, you will still have the Cobras.

I do not travel. I am not much of an extrovert, and I'm not much interested in extroverted objects. I do not care for the 'ideas' of novelists. Novels are wonderful, of course, but I prefer newspapers.

The moral of the story of the Pilgrims is that if you work hard all your life and behave yourself every minute and take no time out for fun you will break practically even, if you can borrow enough money to pay your taxes.

The sloth lives his life upside down. He is perfectly comfortable that way. If the blood rushes to his head, nothing happens because there is nothing to work on.