I've become the person I've always hated, but I'm happier.
I don't have to 'freedom-kiss' my wife when what I really want to do is French-kiss her.
I was the captain of the latent paranoid softball team. We used to play all the neurotics on sunday morning. Nailbiters against the bedwetters, and if you've never seen neurotics play softball, it's really funny. I used to steal second base, and feel guilty and go back.
I read in self-defense.
A: Socrates is a man. B: All men are mortal. C: All men are Socrates.
The only thing standing between me and greatness is me.