By now they had mastered my own language, but they still made simple mistakes, like using 'hermeneutics,' when they meant 'heuristic'.

Figures tell us there are already more people on earth than we need to move even the heaviest piano.

You can't anticipate in the room the riches of what you encounter when you're location hunting for a movie.

I have one last request. Don't use embalming fluid on me; I want to be stuffed with crab meat.

If God exists, I hope he has a good excuse.

I never knew what Amazon was. I've never seen any of those series, even on cable. I've never seen The Sopranos, or Mad Men. I'm out every night and when I come home, I watch the end of the baseball or basketball game, and there's Charlie Rose and I go to sleep.

I'm afraid of the dark,and suspicious of the light.