I'd call him a sadistic, hippophilic necrophile, but that would be beating a dead horse.

Harvard makes mistakes too, you know. Kissinger taught there.

I don't want to live forever through my work. I want to live forever by not dying.

Paranoia is knowing all the facts.

There's nothing sexier than a lapsed Catholic.

What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?

I don't inhale because it gives you cancer, but I look so incredibly handsome with a cigarette that I can't not hold one.