My experience creatively is different than my experience in life, for, as my father would say, the simple reason that you can't get hurt when everything goes wrong creatively.

I'd always wanted to be a dramatic. Comedy comes more naturally to me. I can do it with more facility. So I feel more comfortable with it.

The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty.

We live in far too permissive a society. Never before has pornography been this rampant. And those films are so badly lit!

Don't think of death as an ending. Think of it as a really effective way of cutting down your expenses.

I can't imagine any director directing a screenplay of mine, because the great directors all have very personal styles, and the ones that don't are not very interesting directors.

What if nothing exists and we're all in somebody's dream? Or what's worse, what if only that fat guy in the third row exists?