Today I saw a red and yellow sunset and thought, how insignificant I am! Of course, I thought that yesterday too, and it rained.

I'm a creature of the New York City streets.

For the first year of marriage I had basically a bad attitude. I tended to place my wife underneath a pedestal.

Death is an acquired trait.

I took a test in Existentialism. I left all the answers blank and got 100.

My grandfather was a very insignificant man, actually. At his funeral his hearse followed the other cars.

I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night.