Whosoever loveth wisdom is righteous, but he that keepeth company with fowl is weird.

Umlaut snaps around and we cut to a blond apparition in her early twenties, clearly descended from Olympus by way of Hugh Hefner's mansion.

I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox.

I work all the time because it's a great distraction and it keeps me from sitting home and obsessing morbidly.

Sex is better than talk. Ask anybody in this bar. Talk is what you suffer through so you can get to sex.

Standard mathematics has recently been rendered obsolete by the discovery that for years we have been writing the numeral five backward. This has led to reevaluation of counting as a method of getting from one to ten. Students are taught advanced concepts of Boolean algebra, and formerly unsolvable equations are dealt with by threats of reprisals.

One man starving puts a crimp in my evening.