It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.

Heaven knows, we all make mistakes. That's life - and chess.

Inertia accounts for two-thirds of marriages. But love accounts for the other third.

I can't understand why more people aren't bisexual. It would double your chances for a date on Saturday night.

God is either cruel or incompetent.

My brain? It's my second favorite organ!

Everybody knows how awful the world is and what a terrible situation it is and each person distorts it in a certain way that enables him to get through. Some people distort it with religious things. Some people distort it with sports, with money, with love, with art, and they all have their own nonsense about what makes it meaningful, and all but nothing makes it meaningful. These things definitely serve a certain function, but in the end they all fail to give life meaning and everyone goes to his grave in a meaningless way.