I'm very old-fashioned. I believe that people should stay married for life, like pigeons and Catholics.

Even if God exists, he's done such a terrible job, it's a wonder people don't get together and file a class action suit against him.

Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered?

I should have known something was wrong with my first wife. When I brought her home to meet my parents, they approved of her.

There is no question that there is an unseen world. The problem is, how far is it from midtown and how late is it open?

You're so good looking I can barely keep my eyes on the meter.

I asked the girl if she could bring a sister for me. She did. Sister Maria Teresa. It was a very slow evening. We discussed the New Testament. We agreed that He was very well adjusted for an only child.