In Russia we only had two TV channels. Channel One was propaganda. Channel Two consisted of a KGB officer telling you: Turn back at once to Channel One.

I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of doing - like showering.

In today's society we sometimes forget to balance our hearts and our heads; this is the reason we stop laughing.

I came to America to make it my home, and I did.

Everybody laughs the same in every language because laughter is a universal connection.

In every country, they make fun of city. In U.S. you make fun of Cleveland. In Russia, we make fun of Cleveland.

I fed my ego, but not my soul.