Well, you need to have at least one black friend, otherwise people think you're racist
Actually, I stopped looking at myself in the mirror years ago. I wasn't making it to work on time.
I have a great relationship with my parents. I have not been on lithium.
If I had a billion dollars I would...oh wait...already do.
It's just people trying to get on TV, not like it's really going to do them any good since people can just watch me.
You don't need an alarm clock when you sleep with 20 models a night, one of those broads'll figure out that they better make breakfast in bed or I'll kill all of them.