Is 'Garden State' the next 'Citizen Kane'? Of course not. I'd like to think we aimed a little higher than that, frankly.

I'm not sure when or why the tabloid angle on me was decided that I am a cad. I would have much rather it had been that I am secretly a dentist or that I love soup.

When you were a kid and the circus came to town it was awesome to see these little creatures, but these things go out of fashion, like polyester blazers with rolled up sleeves. We don't have to suffer them anymore so why are there all these little people running around?

The Jews are just clumsy bakers.

Oh sure, I have a few black people in my family tree. They're probably still hanging there.

Sure the jews killed jesus, but the guy was an awful carpenter

Every single person wants to do it, don't hate me because I had the guts to follow my heart!