If John McCain were really a war hero he would've won Vietnam.

I think I suffer from some mild depression.

That cyclone in Burma? That was just me doing the dance to that annoying ass song.

I really couldn't say how famous I really am, that's for the history books to decide. But I'll probably be pretty up there.

Every single person wants to do it, don't hate me because I had the guts to follow my heart!

If we're going to solve the problems in North Korea, the first thing we're going to have to do is start helping them get basic amenities like electricity, televisions, and DVD players over there. Otherwise, how can they watch 'Garden State'?

I mean, I understand that Scrubs was my big break, but sooner or later you have to move on. I've already directed a movie, which received very good reviews, so it just seems much more important to me now. I feel that in order to better foster my creativity as an actor and director at this point, I need to be surrounded by other talented, artistic individuals, instead of just goofy comedians.