If you're dumb enough to volunteer for the army, I don't see why we're supposed to feel so bad when you get shot. I'm not saying we should throw a party or anything, but is it such a tragedy? If I'd gotten shot before I made 'Garden State', yeah, that's a tragedy, but some red-state hick getting his legs blown off? Come on.

I mean, some people accuse me of being racist. I'm totally not, I'm just better than everybody else.

In April 1975 I was born and the Vietnam War ended. I could not let any American die in war before seeing an episode of Scrubs.

I can't say I agree with something that takes the focus away from me.

Ya know, Hitler was this evil, evil man. But with the World Bank and Israel manipulating America, he might have been on to something.

Let's face it, it's only called Scrubs because I'm saving 'Zach Braff' for my autobiography.

I don't think restaurants should refuse to serve minority people. They are quite tasty when prepared correctly.