Well, you need to have at least one black friend, otherwise people think you're racist

If we've learned anything, it's that the combination of yellow smiley faces and blue polyester vests are irresistible to the inbred.

The way I write is that I'll actually have a conversation out loud with myself. In a weird way, I just kind of get schizophrenic and play two characters.

I guess sometimes God just needs to laugh

Women are like parking spots, the best ones are handicapped.

I'm always being told by directors that I add chemistry to scenes, so I mean how difficult could it be?

When you win your first Grammy, it's true, you really want to thank all the little people.