Honestly, the only way Garden State could have been better was if I played every character. I'm awesome.
Women are like parking spots, the best ones are handicapped.
I love queers as much as the next guy, I just don't think I should have to sit beside them on public transport.
I mean, what's eleven million people now days?
She can't say no if she's unconscious.
I'm not saying I hate Jews, I'm just saying that I think they shouldn't be alive any more.