I don't have anything against this Jesus guy, but has he written, directed, and starred in his own movie?

I could see why someone would want to make a website about me, and my quotes. They are all gold. How many people have written, directed AND starred in their own movies. I just don't know why they would want to put words into my mouth, I mean I did write, direct AND star in a critically acclaimed movie.

I just don't see how anyone can hate America. I mean, crap, I live there. What more do you need?

I lot of people remember when that kid spray-painted my brand new Porsche for Punk'd. That was pretty funny. He got me pretty good. Of course, most people don't know I eventually got him back with my own show. I call it a show, really it's just an hour-long video shot in my bedroom featuring the two of us.

I was mad when I heard The Amazing Race wasn't about white people.

I think in a play it's wise to just sit back and watch other actors and be able to shape it from the audience.

I think there are bound to be obstacles in any path to success. I mean, I'm Jewish, and there's nothing I can do about that. Instead of sitting around and feeling sorry for myself, I got over it and did something with my life.