When you look like I do its hard to get a table for one at Chucky Cheese.

Actually, I used to be a busboy in a strip joint in New York and so I hate strip joints. I'm not that kind of person.

As a comic, it's anti-comedy to be known. I think a lot of comedic actors get lost in this world of Hollywood and all this stuff. They lose what brought them there in the first place. I'm very trepidatious about it.

I get burned out on standup. But I like acting. I do like it. But sometimes you just feel like a monkey. You just feel like a complete tool. But I like it. I do like it. Stand-up is just more free. A lot more freedom because you just do what you want to do.

I would have changed my last name if being famous were my goal.

I dream of moving to India, or Pakistan, and becoming a cabdriver.

But comedy is like music, it appeals to some people. Some people like Creed, those people are usually pretty stupid. But they probably also like Carrot Top. I would say that they're part of the same ilk.