A World Cup without Zlatan is not worth watching.

Zlatan doesn’t do auditions.

Kosovo is Serbian, only if my mother is a Virgin

I like Balotelli: he's even crazier than me. He can score a winner, then set fire to the hotel.

I don't need the Ballon d'Or to know I'm the best. It matters more to some players

Wherever I go people recognize me, call my name, cheer for me. But there are names no one cares to remember, that no one cheers for: the 805 million people suffering from hunger in the world today.

When you buy me, you are buying a Ferrari. If you drive a Ferrari you put premium fuel in the tank, you drive onto the motorway and you floor the accelerator. Guardiola filled up with diesel and went for a spin in the countryside. If that’s what he wanted, he should have bought himself a Fiat from the start.