Everyone is equal - a strange Swedish mentality.

Come over to my house with your sister, baby, and I'll show you who's gay!

When I got the red card all the Chelsea players come around. It felt like I had a lot of babies around me.

I don't need the Ballon d'Or to know I'm the best. It matters more to some players

Zlatan doesn’t do auditions.

It was the fault of David Trezeguet, who made me do one drink of vodka after another. I slept in the bathtub. Now I hold my vodka much better.

I like Balotelli: he's even crazier than me. He can score a winner, then set fire to the hotel.