A lot of people would say, to be truthful is to tell all, every dalliance, every crisis. They might be right on paper, but in practice, it's not a great way to go.

I know everything because I know nothing.

The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks.

There's no bigger atheist than me. Well, I take that back. I'm a cancer screening away from going agnostic and a biopsy away from full-fledged Christian.

I have no connection with Hollywood. I'm not interested. I don't care.

I don't have anything against my mom, but my family has no emotional connection to each other.

Mmm, tastes like hepatitis!