My kids don't have a trust fund, they have a debt fund. And when I die, they're $4 million in the hole.

Eat turkey all night long, 50 million Elvis fans can't be wrong.

God gave me some weird, beautiful scent that makes men and women go crazy. People compare it to Carvel. It is a whale of a smell.

I kinda feel like an idiot sometimes. Although I am an idiot, so it kinda works out.

My kids don't have a trust fund, they have a debt fund. And when I die, they're $4 million in the hole.

I drew the duck blue because I've never seen a blue duck before and, to be honest with you I wanted to see a blue duck.

It's hard to soar with the eagles when you're surrounded by turkeys.