I always plan dinner first thing in the morning. That's the only way I can get through the day, having a specific meal to look forward to at night.

My son says I never tell stories about anyone who's living.

That's the great thing about New Year's, you get to be a year older. For me, that wasn't such a joke, because my birthday was always around this time. When I was a kid, my father used to tell me that everybody was celebrating my birthday. That's what the trees are all about.

A summary of every Jewish holiday: They tried to kill us, we won, let's eat!

The ability to absorb a book and make someone else's words and story your own was exactly was I was doing on stage.

Banks have a new image. Now you have 'a friend,' your friendly banker. If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens?

One thing I've never said in my whole life is, 'Let's have dinner at a Japanese restaurant.'