REPORTER, n. A writer who guesses his way to the truth and dispels it with a tempest of words.

SEINE, n. A kind of net for effecting an involuntary change of environment. For fish it is made strong and coarse, but women are more easily taken with a singularly delicate fabric weighted with small, cut stones.

Perseverance - a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.

SYCOPHANT- One who approaches Greatness on his belly so that he may not be commanded to turn and be kicked. He is sometimes an editor.

Quill: An instrument of torture yielded by a goose and commonly weilded by as ass.

At war with savages and idiots. To be a Frenchman abroad is to be miserable; to be an American abroad is to make others miserable.

Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.