Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.

Introduction - a social ceremony invented by the devil for the gratification of his servants and the plaguing of his enemies.

Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted; what the Philistine is pleased to call a joke.

Rum, n. Generically, fiery liquors that produce madness in total abstainers.

GNU, n. An animal of South Africa, which in its domesticated state resembles a horse, a buffalo and a stag. In its wild condition it is something like a thunderbolt, an earthquake and a cyclone.

An immaterial but visible being that inhabited the air when the air was an element and before it was fatally polluted with factory smoke, sewer gas and similar products of civilization.

The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.