Duck-bill, n. Your account at your restaurant during the canvas-back season.

PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.

PRICE, n. Value, plus a reasonable sum for the wear and tear of conscience in demanding it.

Nominee. A modest gentleman shrinking from the distinction of private life and diligently seeking the honorable obscurity of public office.

CAVILER, n. A critic of our own work.

Electricity is the power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else

The clarinet is a musical instrument the only thing worse than which is two.