One of the big tensions in my life is that I have known the stresses of financial hardship since I was a little kid, and it is the cancer for which I am seeking a cure.

I mean, I'll say the filthiest things in the world, but when it comes down to it, I'm kind of a prude.

I don't waste a lot of time on profound embarrassment. I have always been somewhat the same person. I can think of maybe particular items of clothing that I think, "Oh God, I used to wear that?" But nothing serious. It's not like for a while I became some sort of goth wannabe. I've always pretty much been me.

I remember Ozzy Osbourne making a fuss on The Osbournes - people were making a big deal about him taking the garbage out, and he said, "Well, who else is going to do it?" The garbage is full, and you're standing right there. You're still a human being who is going to make yourself a sandwich.

When I would work freelance in production in Chicago, there were a lot of times when I was working for cheap, bad people, and I was working for slave wages anyway, so there were some times when I might have filled out a couple of blank taxi receipts and kept some petty cash. But like I say, I was very selective. It was only people that I thought were assholes. The people that I liked I went far and above saving them money, much less taking it. But that's it. I'm pretty moral. I don't even like stealing jokes.

I've always tried to be nice to people, so that sort of translates into popularity, I guess.

I was prom king. Which is actually saying I was the sixth most popular, because the five who were on homecoming were automatically disqualified from prom, so of course I have to look at it that way.