I've learned... That I wish I could have told my Mom that I love her one more time before she passed away.

Men wake up aroused in the morning. We can't help it. We just wake up and we want you. And the women are thinking, "How can he want me the way I look in the morning?" It's because we can't see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve.

Don't you hate it when...your suitcase is the last one off the airplane?

I've learned... That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

Vegetarian: Indian word for lousy hunter.

My own time is passing fast enough without some national game to help it along.

In the futile attempts we all make to tidy up our lives and our surroundings, nothing is more difficult than throwing out a book.