Numbers are the most certain things we have.
The best thing about a vacation is planning it.
Would a real man get caught eating a twinkie?
Not many people in this world are as lucky as I've been. ... All this time I've been paid to say what is on my mind on television. You don't get any luckier in life than that.
Dogs are nicer than people.
The Super Bowl isn't for kids, I had a great time though and it was worth every nickel of it because by doing this lame piece about the game I can put it on my expense account.