Half the cookbooks tell you how to cook the food and the other half tell you how to avoid eating it.

All economists should be locked up until they admit that they don't know what they're talking about.

If I'd known how many problems I was going to run into before I finished, I can't remember a single project I would have started.

Would a real man get caught eating a twinkie?

In the futile attempts we all make to tidy up our lives and our surroundings, nothing is more difficult than throwing out a book.

The only people who say worse things about politicians that reporters do are other politicians.

If, on the other hand, happiness depends on a good breakfast, flowers in the yard, a drink or a nap, then we are more likely to live with quite a bit of happiness.