Don't you hate it when...your suitcase is the last one off the airplane?

It's best to give advice in only two circumstances; when it's requested, and when it's a life threatening situation.

Let's make a statement to the airlines just to get their attention. We'll pick a week next year and we'll all agree not to go anywhere for seven days.

I've learned... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

Teachers who have plugged away at their jobs for twenty, thirty, and forty years are heroes. I suspect they know in their hearts they've done a good thing, too, and are more satisfied with themselves than most people are. Most of us end up with no more than five or six people who remember us. Teachers have thousands of people who remember them for the rest of their lives.

Have you noticed that they put advertisements in with your bills now? Like bills aren't distasteful enough, they have to stuff junk mail in there with them. I get back at them. I put garbage in with my check when I mail it in. Coffee grinds, banana peels...I write, "Could you throw this away for me?"

I've learned... That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you're hooked for life.