Go to bed. Whatever you're staying up late for isn't worth it.

Men wake up aroused in the morning. We can't help it. We just wake up and we want you. And the women are thinking, "How can he want me the way I look in the morning?" It's because we can't see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve.

Why am I an atheist? I ask you: Why is anybody not an atheist? Everyone starts out being an atheist. No one is born with belief in anything. Infants are atheists until they are indoctrinated. I resent anyone pushing their religion on me. I don't push my atheism on anybody else. Live and let live. Not many people practice that when it comes to religion.

If you get murdered because you go on a date with someone you met on the Internet, you probably deserved it.

I like animals who trust people.

If I'd known how many problems I was going to run into before I finished, I can't remember a single project I would have started.

It would be a better world if everyone in it knew all the truth about everything.