No one ever writes a book in which he is the bad guy.

The two biggest sellers in any bookstore are the cookbooks and the diet books. The cookbooks tell you how to prepare the food, and the diet books tell you how not to eat any of it!

New ideas are one of the most overrated concepts of our time. Most of the important ideas that we live with aren't new at all.

Not many people in this world are as lucky as I've been. ... All this time I've been paid to say what is on my mind on television. You don't get any luckier in life than that.

We aren't consistent in our treatment of animals.

Figure skating is an unlikely Olympic event but its good television. It's sort of a combination of gymnastics and ballet. A little sexy too which doesn't hurt.

Once you pass forty, a dime isn't worth bending over to pick up if you drop one.