On Twitter, when someone would die, I would write a joke. Or if there's a tragedy, I would write a joke and tweet it. That was my thing, and then at a certain point, people started demanding it.

I will never understand how a mother can kill her own baby and not get away with it.

I've spent the past two years looking for my ex-girlfriend’s killer… but no one will do it.

My girlfriend wants an open relationship. I said no way. What kind of man would I be if I had to tell my friends I date you?

What do they call that hat Jewish guys always wear? A Yankees cap.

Comedy Central made me delete the Boston Marathon joke. I wasn't happy about it but, despite popular belief, I can occasionally be a team player.

It's always difficult when someone close to you passes away. But it's really tough when they're on top of you.