I've always been fascinated by dark subjects, especially people's reactions to them. Why are people so uncomfortable talking about death if everyone dies?

I tell very mean jokes.

I actually never acted on "Deadwood." I have meetings all the time where people look at my IMDb page and see that I played the part of "Accounting Clerk" on Deadwood. Actually, I was the accounting clerk for production of "Deadwood."

The best way to break up with a girl is like I'm taking off a band-aid. Slowly and in the shower.

That's the worst way you can hear about comedy material: from a third person's blog story that they wrote when they were upset.

Todd Glass has amazing energy on stage. Dave Attell is one of my favorites because he's a one liner comic who is always incredibly in the moment with the audience. As for newer people, I think Adrienne Iapalucci writes some great, dark jokes and Sean Patton has a hilarious voice on stage.

I prefer to sleep with deaf girls. Those crazy chicks never have a safe word.