Everyone has the same kind of fears; everyone has the same big problems in the world, which is, like, fear of death and I hope horrible things dont happen to my family, but they do. And I think people laugh at them as this great release.

My favorite sport is football. I'm a die hard Steelers fan. Favorite players were Hines Ward and Greg Lloyd.

Halloween is just a made up holiday, created by the razor blade industry.

It's impossible for me to hear the words quadruple murder suicide without thinking of my grandparents.

My sister just had a baby, a little newborn. The kid is adorable, so cute. She wouldn't let me hold him, she refuses. She says, 'No way, Anthony, I'm afraid you're gonna drop him.' I'm 32 years old. Like I'm some kind of idiot. Like I don't have a million other ways to hurt that baby.

I have a twelve year old sex doll. Brand new.

Mike Tyson, what can I say about you that hasn’t already been the title of a Richard Pryor album?