The driving force behind doing everything that I've been doing as a stand-up is having problems with authority and not liking to be told what to do.
Anthony JeselnikI want to marry the kind of girl that walks out of an abortion clinic with a lollipop.
Anthony JeselnikDonald, I'm not sure if you're even aware of this, but the only difference between you and Michael Douglas from the movie, Wall Street, is that no one's going to be sad when you get cancer.
Anthony Jeselnik