It's impossible for me to hear the words quadruple murder suicide without thinking of my grandparents.

It's always difficult when someone close to you passes away. But it's really tough when they're on top of you.

My perfect night would be going out to an awesome restaurant, then heading over to the Comedy Cellar to hang out with other comics, drinking beers and making fun of each other.

I'm a realist all the way. I'm too cynical to be an optimist. But I've lived too much of a charmed life so far to ever be a pessimist.

My girlfriend is despicable. I just found out she flirted with my brother, during my mom's funeral, while I was asleep.

I got into comedy because I wanted to get into writing.

I had a happy childhood in a nice suburban area, pretty idyllic, upper middle class and very, very white. My dad is an attorney. My mother is a housewife. They had five kids in seven years: me, my brother, and three sisters. I'm the oldest. We were all very active. My mother was exhausted.