What do they call that hat Jewish guys always wear? A Yankees cap.
Valentine's Day was created by the greeting card industry to get pussy.
My favorite sport is football. I'm a die hard Steelers fan. Favorite players were Hines Ward and Greg Lloyd.
My girlfriend was just killed in a car accident. Devastating. I can't believe I'm only going to have sex with her one more time.
The opposite of sad is down's syndrome.
My sister is going to have a simple wedding. Just immediate family. And whoever the hell would want to marry her.